A Sweet Word From God Last Night

Last night I was really having trouble falling asleep.  It had been a good day but also one that made me feel like a crappy mother.  The first incident was at the YMCA pool.  Hayden and I were swimming in the indoor pool with some friends…which by the way had way too much bleach in water.  Anyways, Hayden was throwing around a toy and swimming to get it.  He threw it in the deep end.  I was watching him go swim and get it…he had his life jacket on.  I was actually proud of him for swimming so fast and I inched closer to him as he got farther away from me.  A mom friend calls out to me to make sure I see him and I give her the nod.  But then the life guard whistles me down and tells me I need to stay with in arms reach.  Bummer.  I just got whistled at.

Then right before bed we were having a snack.  Hayden was eating mini Lorna Doone cookies.  He was being goofy and threw one in his mouth and at the same time tilted his head back.  It lodge in his throat pretty hard and I picked him up and started beating his back.  After what seemed like forever he managed to stick his finger down his own throat as I was beating his back and all but his breakfast came up.  I showed him the cookie and was so proud of how he made himself get it out.  He was pretty upset and scared.  But after a little bit of rocking and his passy he felt better.

Needless to say I snuggled up with him in his bed until he fell asleep.  I got up and tried to go to bed, couldn’t sleep, tried to forget the events, and couldn’t.  So around 12:30am(three hours later) I knew I needed to just go spend some time with the Lord.  I was feeling guilty about the pool and feeling out of control about the choking.  And my pregnancy hormones were making me even more emotionally drastic  and making me think how in the world was I going to keep this kid alive for the next fifteen years much less any more brothers and sisters.

After some prayer time, I got up and opened my Bible(YouVersion).  I really wanted to read some Psalms.  And my page automatically open up to Psalm 5.  I scrolled up to Psalm 4 and it was clear as day.  This is the last verse of Psalm 4…

I will lie down and sleep in peace,
for you alone, O Lord,
make me dwell in safety.
I shut my computer in awe.  Those were the sweetest words.  Acknowledging that all was in His hands I went to bed and fell asleep.  I think that verse will find its way into Hayden’s room real soon.

I Really Need to Blog More Often

Every time I think about sitting down to blog I get a little overwhelmed because I have so much I would LOVE to share and then I just decide to do it later.  And the cycle begins and I never actually sit down to blog.  This summer makes three years of blogging for me.  I started right before Hayden was born to share pictures with my family who live out of state.  Well, then I started writing more and made my own blog that I could just write whatever I wanted to and kept the other one for the pictures.  But now with Facebook I find it much easier to put up tons of pictures so there is really no need for the picture blog…that is if YOU are on Facebook…ummm cough…Heather!!!

So anyways here’s some seriousness…

At the beginning of the year I wrote about how my “one word” to focus on this year is “Closer.”  Pretty much I decided that I never wanted to say “i wish i was as close as I once was to the Lord and to the people that are most important in my life.”  From now on I want to be closer every day and to be making the steps to make it happen.  But I am learning it is a closeness that I cannot attain on my own but only with the grace that is given to me.  Where sin abounds grace abounds even more.  And as I find myself drawing closer to the Lord and to those I love, I am finding a grace that is more than I can understand and a love that moves me to go more.  A few verses that go along with this…

Isaiah 58…well the whole chapter…you will just have to read it for yourself.  But mainly, the people are drawing near to the Lord in their own self-righteousness.  And they were delighting in it!  My prayer is that I will draw closer to the Heart of God.  That I will “pour myself out” (verse 10) as He has done for me.

Psalm 73…whole thing…Unbelieveable!!!  last verse…”But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all your works.”  It is good to be near God.  It is good to be near God.  It is good to be near God.  Can I say that enough? Ever asked yourself “What is good?”…to be near God.  Just take one taste of the goodness…it will make you want more.

and James 4:8…i love how the New Living Translation says it…”Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.”  It sounds kind of conditional at first.  That we are making the first move.  Let us not be so proud.  He is the Inviter.  He is the Host.

So I will end with this.  I am not sure what I was thinking when I said that I wanted to be “closer” to the Lord.  It seems to be a very holy place to be.  A place that I am unworthy to be.  And as for drawing closer to others… Do I really want all my weaknesses and sins to be known?  Is it true that when we disclose the dirt in our hearts that we find more grace and that we become closer.  Yes, it is true, with those who have invited us in.  And it is so so good.

Sewing Project #2

I FINALLY finished the dining room curtains!  YAY!!!  I was hoping to make them a little more fancy with adding some pinched pleats at the top but the fabric with the backing ended up being a little too thick for my sewing machine.  And no way was I going to do them by hand.  So it made the job a lot easier…just some simple panels.  I am REALLY enjoying sewing!

And I have also been having a lot of fun with this little guy!!!  We’ve been enjoying some hot chocolate and some pool time together lately…depending on the weather!

Grief Share – Day One

Today we had our first meeting with my small group in Grief Share.  We are going through this book together – Grieving the Child I Never Knew by Kathe Wunnenburg.  I have only just begun but I would highly recommend it to anyone who is grieving in this way.  We had a very special time together today.  I am so grateful for the ladies in my group.  You may be wondering about how I have been doing because it is not something that you just ask someone.  And being pregnant it may seem that I have moved on.  Well, it has been a journey for sure and I hope to share more as I go.  It has been hard to share about much of anything because this grief in my own heart has been so so subtle and yet so consuming.  So sometimes I don’t even know how I am really doing.  I am seeing ways that it has crept into so much of my heart and mind.  Causing my heart to fear and keeping my hope and joy surpressed.  I can already testify today though of the healing and restoration that is happening already.  I am so thankful and grateful.  Thanks for being patient too since I have been so out of the blogging world.  I am praying I will be all the more hopeful and joyful in Christ.  I will always remember His mercy and goodness.  And I am reminded that when I am weak, He is strong.   Thanks for your sweet love and prayers over the past months.

Sweet, Sticky, and Spicy Chicken

This was so YUMMY! I made this for dinner tonight with rice and a side salad.  I got the recipe from AllRecipes but adapted it a bit.  I’ll make a note of what I did differently.  It may be a little spicy for a toddler.  Hayden did not try it but I think it would have been too spicy for him anyways.  He loves lettuce though.  He filled up on that and biscuits.

Sweet, Sticky, and Spicy Chicken

• 1 tablespoon brown sugar
• 2 tablespoons honey
• 1/4 cup soy sauce
• 2 teaspoons chopped fresh ginger root ( I used 1 tsp. of ground ginger)
• 2 teaspoons chopped garlic ( I used 1 tsp. of minced garlic instead)
• 2 tablespoons hot sauce ( I only used one Tbsp and i thought it was spicy enough)
• salt and pepper to taste
• 4 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves – cut into 1/2 inch strips
• 1 tablespoon vegetable oil (i used olive oil)

1. Mix together brown sugar, honey, soy sauce, ginger, garlic and hot sauce in a small bowl.
2. Lightly salt and pepper the chicken strips.
3. Heat oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add chicken strips and brown on both sides, about 1 minute per side. Pour the sauce over the chicken. Simmer uncovered until the sauce thickens, 8 to 10 minutes.

A few other things I did…

Before I browned the chicken I used the pan to saute some onion and green pepper.  I took it out and set it aside.  I only used two chicken breasts and cut it into smaller cubes.  I coated it with flour mixed with some salt and pepper before I browned it in the skillet. And I had my skillet on medium high heat since it is calphanon (sp?) and then turned it down to medium when I added the sauce.

For the side salad I used Red Leaf lettuce.  My favorite dressing is made from brown sugar, vegetable oil, and rice vinegar…made of equal parts. About 1 Tbsp of each is enough to coat salads for Jason, Hayden and myself.

The little man in my belly is kickin’ now for sure!  I hope you enjoy it!!!

Couponing Again- My Drugstore Deals!

I have just started going back to CVS.  I also started doing the RiteAid thing because we moved and now have one right down the street.  Well, yesterday I was going through all my coupons and realized I could get some great deals!  It was fun shopping last night!  Here’s what I got for about $7.50 out of pocket from CVS and RiteAid…12 items!!!  And that doesn’t include the $6.00 I have in ECB’s for my next CVS trip!  I may go back today because their truck comes in today and I wanted a razor that they were out of.  YAY!

A Few Recipes

Here are a few good things I have made lately!  All were YUMMY!!  I have a few other recipes to post later that I will have to type out.  Enjoy!

New Potatoes With Caper Sauce

Double Tomato Bruschetta

Banana Crumb Muffins

Spinach and Strawberry Salad

Oh Boy!

Okay, so my healthy eating has been going well.  I had to clarify though that healthy eating for me didn’t cut out sweets and such!  It was just an effort to eat more fruits and veggies.  Which has been great!

In case you haven’t heard yet, we are having a BOY!!!  We are soooo excited about having another boy and I can see how having boys could become addictive.   As I was sitting out in my driveway this afternoon in the warm sunshine, clipping coupons,  Hayden was running around “shootin’ hoops.”  It was all so enjoyable and made me sooo excited about watching the two of them running around together one day!  It will be fun for them to share a room together, too.  We joked about putting the baby into Hayden’s room immediately so that Hayden could get a taste of his own medicine.  (Hayden was and still is not the greatest sleeper.)  We are still working on a name.  Well, we haven’t worked very hard yet.  Last time we changed our mind when I was about 8 months pregnant.   So I am not going to rush naming him.  It will come at the right time.

We are so thankful for a healthy pregnancy!  Sometimes, I am still surprised by being pregnant.  I get overwhelmed at what a miracle it is that God has created.  And knowing that He is in total control over it all is very humbling.  It is also very freeing.  About a month ago I was faced with the pain again from our miscarriage last year.  I began praying that God would comfort that pain and loss and that he would heal me in his perfect time.  About 10 days later a lady came up to me on Sunday morning at our church and said that God had laid me on her heart.  She wanted to start a small group for women who have been through a miscarriage(s), a birth loss, or infertility.  All in God’s perfect timing!  Yes, the Lord is close to the broken-hearted.  He definitely hears our cry.

Well, it is probably about time to get started on the nursery.  Thankfully, we can use a lot of what we have already!  The main thing will be new curtains!  So I guess it is off to the sewing machine!  But I have to finish my other curtains first.  And probably Hayden’s room too.   So much fun ahead!!!